Gratitude… it’s preached so much it’s become cliché.

It’s on all the inspirational memes and blogs… it’s our path to “finding miracles,” bringing abundance, planting “little smiley faces on everything it touches”…. [gag *cough* puuuukkke!!!]. 

And while logically I know the benefits of gratitude and I actually practice it often, the last thing I want to hear is someone else preaching its virtues to me. [gag me again *cough cough* gaaaagggg!!!]

But this morning on NPR’s Fresh Air, I heard a new, very simple-yet-thought-provoking, interesting take on gratitude.  Hip hop artist IDK stated simply that for him, gratitude was a path to closure. Closure. On a tumultuous relationship with his mom, on time served in jail… gratitude was a path to closure. Which then allowed him to move forward with his life.

How many of us so desperately need closure? From those things from the past that that just keep niggling at us; that continue to take us by surprise, setting off triggers when we least expect it.

For me, of course, the biggest hardship I’ve had to find closure for was the loss of my beloved life partner, my best friend, and Emie’s sweet daddy… and with him, the loss of the whole future I’d envisioned when I said “I do” and when our daughter was born, when we traded in my convertible for a minivan that would carry a family of 5 on many road trips and adventures.  

And while losing Travis and accepting my new life has been, at times, devastating— even paralyzing, I realized this morning that my ability to find closure has been THE lifeline that’s helped me forge forward, continue growing, and yes, feel joy again.  And IDK’s insight rang true… gratitude paved my path toward closure.

In those initial, numb hours and days after losing Travie, gratitude was the thing that kept me going.

Gratitude for my beautiful, sweet infant. Gratitude for my friends and family who became my rocks and led me forward. Gratitude for the hospital staff who did their utmost to save Trav, and who let me be there, holding him, the entire time they attempted to resuscitate him.  Gratitude for the bonds of love that Trav had created, which turned into outpourings of support that I didn’t even know existed.

Before this morning, I’d seen those sentiments as just a necessary light that I’d needed to grab onto, simply to make it through each dark minute, hour, and day. But thanks to IDK’s insight, I now understand those sentiments as something so much more powerful, more lasting, more permanent.

Those little moments of gratitude built a rock solid foundation that have helped me climb to the top of a deep, dark hole. 

This morning I’m grateful to IDK, for opening my eyes to such a beautiful new perspective.

To hear the whole interview, click here. I’m sure it’ll breathe a little fresh air your day.